Hey how's it goin

 Hey ya'll, I'm Dreamer Nebula and I'm new to gardening. Well, not exactly - I had technically started gardening last year, and achieved great success with killing everything I had planted. Aww yiss 🥳

"It'll be easy!" I said. "It'll be fun!"

Within a month, every last sprout died not with a bang, but with a whimper. I started out way too big. Eight bell pepper plants, eight onion seeds, eight tomato seeds, 6 garlic, and three romaine lettuce ends. Every last one died an undignified death. No battle, no heroism, no death in the line of duty - just withering away under the harsh light of the sun amidst the wildass wildfires. Congratulations Dreamer, your first attempt was an abject failure. Woo!

So a few months ago I sat down and mulled over giving things a go again for 2021. I'm certain I've done my research (i.e. started reading articles but got distracted by memes) and, per the advice of my partner Orion Nebula, I started out small this time.

One grape tomato start in one pot, one long planter with twelve garlics. I was powerfully tempted to pick up every vegetable start I saw but I made my will save and went home with a much smaller project in tow (lookin' right at'cha, granddaddy D&D editions!)

The question that's always griping at me from the back of my mind is this: why would I bother planting after failing so badly? So I sat down a few months ago and thought things through (a mental exercise that I partake in rarely). I knew I wanted to grow fruits and vegetables, but why? Surely I could not grow enough to sustain my household of gremlins (four of us in total), so what was the point?

It was then that it dawned on me: I wanted to feed my household, even if it's not 100% garden-grown veggies, and I wanted to share my veggies with my local community. Just throwing my little pebble of community action into the ocean of food insecurity. Throughout The Plague™ in 2020, I drove around and donated food from my own pantry to my locals who were going hungry. I had the means to help, the ability to help, and the resources required to feed a few mouths. Hunger? Not on my watch.

People shouldn't have to go hungry. So I'm stepping in.

Now let's see the goods!

His name is Kevin and he's leaning on the trellis. He's like that weird kid who leans in on the edge your friend group, wishing he was included and weak-laughing along with the jokes but ultimately shies away - hi, I'm that weirdass kid - and like that weird kid, this plant pokes a bit out of his comfort zone (trellis) to try to include himself in the world outside.

Say hi to Kevin.

Oh GOD these are my twelve garlics. They are my sons and they have no chill. They've been growing an inch each day and soon they will claw their way out of the dirt and go on a murderous, garlicky rampage. I'm so proud of them 😭

This is my watering can. Yeah, I've got a Batman watering can. Does that make me dorky? A hopeless dork? Yes, but consider this: I have a Batman watering can and you don't, so I'm cooler than you.

I'm giving gardening another go. It's gonna be great, even if this ship sinks, because at least we got to sail. I'd like you to come visit my blog again please, relax with a level one gardening nerd. It'll be great. We'll have freshly-grown veggies. Karl Marx is in the back somewhere. We'll have a good time!

Hell yeah, June 1st and I finished this post with 15 minutes left in the day